Last night
When I was on the train
Going through the Port of Oakland
I saw numerous gigantic cranes
Sitting along the coastline
Against the orange setting sun
And they reminded me of Tsing Yi
My ear started to hurt
My head started aching
My vision blurred a little
For a moment
I thought I was on the Airport Express
Zooming to Hong Kong Station
Thinking I was going home
Wait
I WAS going home
Just a different home
13 comments
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March 5, 2009 at 5:53 am
ta sun sun
ok, so when are you coming home?
March 5, 2009 at 10:49 am
hongkieatlarge
sun sun,
i don’t know – it’s so expensive for us all to come, you know? hopefully, next summer…
March 5, 2009 at 8:33 am
readandeat
You have two. I have one only.
March 5, 2009 at 10:52 am
hongkieatlarge
readandeat,
i honestly don’t know which is better, having one home or two. i guess when you have only one home, you feel more settled. and i think that’s a good thing, right?
March 5, 2009 at 3:10 pm
exile from hk
I think home is where your heart is. Actually I prefer to just have one home. I don’t want to split my heart in two.
Hong Kong doesn’t feel like home any more. More like my home city (鄉下!). Every time I go back, I would stay for a month or so, then I’d be very happy to run back to California.
March 5, 2009 at 5:32 pm
hongkieatlarge
exile from hk,
for the most part, i think the US is my home. it’s just once in a while, I’ll have a nostalgia attack & become a little “homesick”.
March 5, 2009 at 9:21 pm
lcl
The first week when I came to NYC, sometimes I woke up at night I thought I was in HK. It was very very haunting.
March 6, 2009 at 10:59 am
hongkieatlarge
when i first came here, there’s been a few months where i was traveling back & forth between hk & sf. i would wake up in the middle of the night not knowing where i was. it was really scary at first. after a while, it’s just like, oh, husband is here – it’s sf, or husband is not here – it’s hk.
March 7, 2009 at 1:12 am
michelle
something funny in me, i woke up very often at night not knowing where i was, even when i lived in Hk. Until i came to France, it stopped. Since then i suppose i’ve found my place. But then, as age grows, specially since the birth of my own child, i start trying to find my roots…
March 9, 2009 at 9:53 am
hongkieatlarge
michelle,
i actually don’t really have problems with figuring out where i am – it was just when i was riding the train the other day, i suddenly realized how similar it was, in certain ways, the 2 places that i call home.
about finding roots: i am more interested to learn about chinese culture only after i left hk; especially now that i have a kid, i feel like i have the responsibility to teach him about chinese culture.
March 10, 2009 at 2:19 am
michelle
understanding chinese culture, indeed, that is what i wanted to say… and learning cooking too
D
March 17, 2009 at 10:34 pm
周游
totally understand:)
i have been having this “struggle” for a while, that there is still a hidden hope to move back to hk. then i will “regain” my family, all my friends, and of course the food. it turned out to be my unfulfilled dream, an escape corner…. until the point that i must “kill” hk in my mind, so as to realise sweden as a home, our home.
March 19, 2009 at 8:25 am
hongkieatlarge
Same here. There was a time, I think about 3 years ago, I was always secretly hoping that we’ll be moving to Hong Kong. But last time I was back visiting my family & friends, my mind changed. I now think that while HK is a great place to be in, for this stage of my life, California is the best for me. My husband still doesn’t know I had once wanted to go back so badly